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smashwindowbleed

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ive reached top and bottom [03 Mar 2006|05:29pm]
i have so much anger inside its at boiling point. i am going to explode soon because this whole time its been accumulating. its a lot of small things that bug the fuck out of me. why dont people have the courtesy to treat others and their belongings with respect? answer because there is no respect anymore. the mentality people have is greed and whatever they can get their hands on. if something is not yours then why fucking touch it? its not yours dont fuck with it. im broke im sober im single what else do you fuckin want from me? i have nothing left. fine do what you will. just assume and be happy with the material objects which will perish anyway. friendship lasts so much longer but obviously you think money and objects will bring you temporary happiness.
bottom line fuck off and go to hell.
6 <3

[24 Feb 2006|05:58pm]
so..times are changing.
things are being rotated.
people are being weeded out.
in time, ill be moving to fullerton.
4 <3

fuck. [28 Jun 2005|11:33pm]
tonight
i watched my first dodgeball game.
i watched my roommate walk out.
i watched my self fall to pieces.
2 <3

[27 Mar 2005|02:31pm]
currently on my to do list:
get more ink
change my wardrobe over
paint my 36x48 canvas
fufill sexual desires

thats it for now
5 <3

twentythree [27 Mar 2005|02:19pm]
so for my birthday i went to the snooty fox for breakfast. absolutely great. hands down. then picked up my paycheck and cashed it. yay for money. changed my clothes and went off to newport. visited my managers old store in the westcliff plaza. went bar hopping. this one place i do remember was goathill tavern. had a shot of tequila and a beer. that place was going off the hook. then we stopped at mr. j's off of edinger and the 55. total strip joint. never been there before. got introduced to a drink called the "wet pussy". it definitely wet my lips for sure. the dancers were pretty acrobatic with the pole. i got a lapdance from a dancer who was amazingly beautiful. she teased me so much i couldnt keep myself from thinking naughty thoughts. she told me to sit back, relax and spread my legs and then shed do the rest. do the rest she did. she spanked her bare ass and thrusted her knee smoothly into my crotch. it was great.
that ended the night in newport. came home after then partied later. nothing like turning twenty three. you should try it in a couple years. im glad i have my friends. its like a unity and we all combine to become this unstoppable triforce.
3 <3

friday [21 Mar 2005|07:04pm]
monday is tip day. tip day is counting money for four hours. tips came out to be two dollars and fifty cents. pretty good. later did some laundry and just lounged around all day. tomorrow is an early shift. looking forward to it dearly. radiohead is fucking brilliant. just absolutely stunning. four days until my birthday.
<3

six days until [19 Mar 2005|08:40am]
id say i had a good day yesterday. i sold some clothes at dee-lux and buffalo exchange. nothing like cold hard cash at my fingertips. this cute girl asked how i fit into the jeans i was selling cause it was a size 25. i just laughed. she ended up snagging them at that very moment. i shouldve left my number in the pockets. i will do that next time. i ended up trying these jeans on at buffalo exchange and bought em. they didnt have a tag but another cute indie girl told me they were from anthropologie. stoked. they have pockets on the side of the legs. its great.
later on i met up with a girl from work at saw the ring two. eh it was ok. i fell asleep at one part but caught all the creepy parts. the kalidoscope is full of lost highschool children. its pathetic. throughout the movie there were unnecessary outbursts. thats what i get for going to see a movie in public.
so, throughout yesterday i constantly saw cute girls. consistency is great.
4 <3

this year is iffy [17 Mar 2005|11:32pm]

my 2005 so far.
1. broke up with my girlfriend.
2. visited my family in hawaii.
3. changed cell phone services.
4. did an abstract painting.
5. renewed my license.
6. met the regional manager of starbucks.
11 <3

[08 Nov 2004|12:23am]
its been a long week of work.
my last day off was friday.
eight straight days of work.
overtime is sure going to
put me in good standing of
having a decent paycheck.
i spent the whole day
helping my friends move
to the next apartment
building. let me tell you
its not easy work.
im exhausted.
2 <3

days turn into weeks [02 Nov 2004|02:15pm]
ive been quite busy.
working. sleeping.
i got a tattoo.
three hours of work.
for all you who think
it will hurt. it doesnt.
its almost healed.
ill post a picture later.
now im going to watch
COMMANDO.
1 <3

[06 Oct 2004|05:27pm]
[ mood | content ]

well ive moved in.
im also alive.
i have a girlfriend.
im learning from mistakes.
how is everyone.

6 <3

no longer solo. [24 Jul 2004|01:05am]
lately ive been quite busy. ive been spending a lot of time with my girlfriend. ive also been accumulating problems with my car. accumulating problems means spending money to fix it. ive also been working a number of hours. im moving out soon and thats gonna be a big change in my life. but its gonna be for the better.
15 <3

night in history [13 Jul 2004|01:49am]
today brought a positive aspect as long as a negative one.
i met a girl i thought i had no chance with. she looked like she was way out of my reach. kinda like the one you can never have but its good to dream about. well the basic rundown is that shes beautiful, open minded, fashion oriented, and she has her own opinion about things which turns me on. we talked a lot about our lives over jamba juice. it was romantic.
on the way back my car dies. im in the center lane on the 5 and i see the lights in my car start to flicker on and off and all of a sudden i lose the power to accelerate. i immediately pull to the shoulder lane and open the hood to check my battery. it wouldnt start so i call my friend tim and he willingly complies to come down to try and jump start my car. i try to help him get the cables set up but it was so scary standing near the edge of the freeway with HUGE TRAILER trucks driving by at killing speed. i never realized how noisy a highway was until tonight. with the generator hooked up i tried starting my car, no dice. so i give my uncle a ring and he willingly drives down and ties a rope from his van to my car and tows me to the buick dealer ship of TUSTIN which is convienantly off the next exit i was near. i had to push the brake really hard to stop cause my car was practically DEAD. oh man how angry i got at my car and the moment it decided to die. of all nights it had to be this night. typical. in the end the situation proved positive cause me and jen got to know each other on a different level and feel way comfortable being around each other.

so that was my night. never to be forgotten.
7 <3

[26 Jun 2004|06:59pm]
these days have been my days. i havent spent time with friends. im losing ties with friends each day. maybe theres a time where i know people and a time we go our separate ways. im such a nomad.

i dont feel the need to go out anymore. call it overrated but i call it quits. occasionally hit up my starbucks but just for coffee and a little chit chat. and back home i go. people have been asking me to hang out and i tell them yes and a maybe with some hesitation. i dont feel like hanging out and yet i still lead people on. yeah im a jerk for that.

on other news im moving to fullerton and im going apartment hunting soon. im exicited for the upcoming move.
8 <3

[07 Jun 2004|01:05am]
harry potter. brilliant.
oh yeah im back.
8 <3

[23 May 2004|10:15pm]
im officially on vacation in hawaii.
its as beautiful as i left it.
updates will occur soon.
4 <3

[18 May 2004|02:21pm]


a five minute old picture of my current exterior.
6 <3

[14 May 2004|01:55am]
me and jenna got some boba tea at tea station and it was gooood. i felt the need to watch van helsing due to all the advertising the movie was great. cheesy but action packed. again great.

my goal is to meet a new person every day. ive accomplished it so far this week. on to bigger and better things now, i have decided that since i work in two point five hours, im going to drive to work and camp out in the parking lot until four thirty am. this ensures that i wont be late to work. it will be a long day and ill be ready for it.
3 <3

[12 May 2004|09:33am]
ive made changes. changes in how
ill live each day from now on.
each day will be worthwhile, and
it wont be wasted away like the past.
ive realized that im here to
accomplish something. and no matter
what it is there is nothing
that can prevent me from succeeding.
4 <3

[10 May 2004|10:39pm]
i hate when your night
comes to and end
and it ends like shit.
i deserve to die.
fuck. i hate myself.

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